It's not like I'm not trying, I'll give anyone a shot once

Here is the difference between boys and girls: Girls will give any boy a shot, boys refuse to take girls out they are not attracted to.

Lately this has been made overwhelmingly clear to me as I've observed a few different scenarios:

1. I was asked if I would go on a date with a boy who is not attractive to me at all, and has a voice defect making his voice higher then normal, after some internal debate I thought, you know what? Why not? What's the worst that could happen?

2. A friend was trying to set a another friend up, and asked a guy friend if he would take her out. The guy friend then asked for a picture, took one look and said "nah, she's not my type."

This poor girl in scenario two has had the same reaction by two different boys. What is it with men of my generation? Why do they think they are God's gift to the world. I can't speak for the first boy that didn't give her a chance, but I know for a fact guy number two is definitely not a 10 in the looks department, he doesn't have his life together, and should definitely not be so picky. It's so disheartening to see guys react this way. It's all about looks for most men. Women on the other hand generally will give any guy a shot once. What's a girl to do in a world where men overlook her, and even when she tries to take things into her own hands, it never works because ultimately it's up to the man?

This picture is so true! Men think they are hot stuff when they obviously are not, and women are just as hard on themselves as men are on them! Ridiculous! 

Switching gears a bit I was thinking and talking out (again with Laurel last night) how crazy it is for us to be 25 and not married while some of our peers are on third and fourth children. I started thinking how amazing it is that I am single, and how much more I know, then I would have known going into a marriage young.

1. People are the best version of themselves while dating. Anything that bugs you now will be magnified when you are married and living together.

2, Talking about intimacy/showing physical manifestations of love is CRUCIAL before marriage, especially if it is important to you. I just thought that all men loved sex no matter what, so I don't know that I would have ever brought up an awkward sex conversation if I had gotten married young, but now I realize that it is super important, and needs to be discussed, if we are truly in love it won't be an awkward conversation

3. Going to all three hours of church really does matter. It shows your commitment level to the gospel, not going, or skipping out early is a huge red flag because to me not only does it signify lack of commitment to the gospel, but other areas as well

4. Loyalty is the most important attribute to me. I want to be able to count on my partner. I want us to be able to talk about anything and everything, and we have to be able to trust each other, and be there for each other

5. Temple attendance ESPECIALLY in SLC where we have so many temples so close is SOOOO important to me. It is another tell tale sign of commitment, and priorities.

6. People can change. I have two clients who have tragic stories of their husbands changing years down the road, this is still something I have not completely overcome. Probably my biggest hold up in marriage. I am picky enough as it is, to think that I find a man who meets me criteria, only to have it all be an act. When he gets tired of the charade then I am high and dry either in an unhappy marriage, or on my own with the kids

7. Ability to communicate, talk things out is key in any relationship. If you run and lock yourself away in the face of confrontation, nothing will ever get solved in your marriage. You have to take the bulls by the horn, and actually talk about things with your partner, even things that may be hard or touchy.

8. The love languages are real! In order to truly feel love/show love to your partner you have to figure out how they receive love!

9 Motivation, goals, drive and ambition are super important to me. I want someone that not only succeeds, but who pushes himself to be the best he can be to provide for his family. I never thought that I would have to specify that I want a man who can provide, but seriously this world is scary! So many men living in their mother's basements with no jobs playing video games perfectly content with their lives. There are men with motivation, good jobs, education, and career goals too, and I want to find myself one!

10. I want a man who is a leader. Someone who can preside over the home, someone who holds the priesthood worthily, and who does his home teaching, holds and fulfills his church callings, and who can take charge and lead.

So far that is my list of lessons learned while being 25 and single. Seriously the list grows almost daily! I know I am where I am supposed to be in my life today!